I've lost my voice

I got to spend four days at Blissdom Canada last week and it was amazing!

I learned so much and my to do lists are now immeasurably long, but what I learned - gold.

Except this: Apparently stream of consciousness blogging is SO 2008. Oh. Crap.

What it really made me realize is that I need to figure out who I am (so philosophical!) My personal blog, this blog that I started over four years ago, it's floundering. I have no direction. The tone is nothing like it was four years ago which was a straight journal: Kiernan is eating solids! Kiernan slept through the night! etc etc etc

That tone no longer feels like what I want my blog to be, but I also miss having that record of milestones and stories for the twins. And I rarely write any more because nothing really feels right.

I have been trying out different voices in the last few months. Some I like, some ring untrue. Another clear nugget from this past week - BE AUTHENTIC. If what I write feels like I'm not being myself, I shouldn't post it.

Scott Stratten started off the conference with a very inspiring speech that was wonderful but left me a bit.... stressed. He told us to "only write amazing."

Thankfully I heard not everyone agrees, knowing full well that that might only happen twice a year. And maybe that's where I'm getting stuck "Why write if it isn't going to be amazing?"

They told us to try to suck less. To be aware that sometimes you will suck and to be ok with that, but that there are ways to put effort into sucking less. EDIT, go over and cut out the crap (which reminds me of a tip I once heard that suggesting cutting out the first and last paragraph of anything you write because they are probably unnecessary).

Suck less.
Be amazing.
Know your voice.
Be authentic.
Stay true to yourself and your brand.
Inspire your readers to connect with you.
Be creative.

No pressure or anything!

So I sit here and I wonder how to find the voice that feels real and right. I wonder how to define the purpose of Gliding Through Motherhood. Does Gliding Through Motherhood even apply anymore? How can I bring that name to a new place that is nothing about rocking babies?

I struggle with these questions. The writing that I do on other blogs is so clear - the topic and the voice. Here, I question most everything.

I welcome your feedback. Are the experts right? Do you want to only read well crafted posts and not the mindless ramblings of my mind? Have you noticed my attempts at different styles? Have they rung true? What are your favourite posts that I write. No holds barred - give it to me straight.

Because I need my voice back.