Friday, April 09, 2010

jealous

I am jealous...

... of the mothers who seem to not get worn down by the neediness
... of the parents who don't resort to yelling
... of the patience I've seen other parents exhibit
... of people who have the time and the energy to take a class or pursue a personal hobby. Who have a little bit of time for themselves.

This has been a particularly trying week. Quinn had roseola and he doesn't do sick well. Juliette believes her world will end if I leave the room. Well, Quinn seems to think that too. Kiernan is still being noisy. I know it will get better. I know I'll feel a bit more in control again soon. But this week, I feel beaten down. I hate that.

I got a glorious break yesterday, but with the debt I have right now, and the angry "how could you have left me" reception, I quickly felt depleted again. At least I slept. (One day, I should document the variety of nights we have : trying, regular, good. It's loads of fun).

I know it will get better. I know I'll feel a bit more in control again soon. Say it with me. I know it will get better. I know I'll feel a bit more in control again soon.

6 comments:

Julie said...

i'm jealous of those women too. then i try and remind myself that we are just seeing them on a good day. we don't see them on their regular days where they raise their voices, sit their kid down for time out while trying not to slam them down out of lack of patience and barely have time to wipe a face cloth to get the sleep out or their eyes.

tomorrow the sun will be out and things will look brighter.

Mary Lynn said...

Julie's right--I suspect even those women you think have it all together have rough days, too. Things do start to get a wee bit easier once kids start to get older, too. Over the last year my kids have been becoming less and less needy. I still have tough days with them, but they don't seem to come quite so often.

@WannabeMomErin said...

I agree with Julie, I think every mother has days when things just click, and days where everything just goes wrong. And the majority of the days are between the two extremes.
Having twins is EXTRA hard, because you have 2 babies in the same stage at the same time. It will get easier, you have my guarantee on that (note: not a guarantee).

Jenn said...

Totally right - no one is Supermom, no matter what they make themselves out to be on their blog! Some of us just choose to talk about it more than others! I'm VERY patient...in public. I never yell...in public. We all have our days, good ones and bad ones, and it WILL get better!

JennyB said...

hey, we're going to be quilting soon. You'll be one of those people soon too! Hang in there! chow. ;P

Capital Mom said...

I am jealous of all those things too! Also add moms that lose all the baby weight right away, parents whose kids sleep and moms that have twins and still find time to knit socks. Oh, wait. :-)

Seriously, you are doing so awesome! Just hang in there and take each minute as it comes. Sometimes I can't think beyond that.